It seems everything has come to a complete and unstoppable Halt in my dating life.
It's almost too gruesome to unpack. And, thankfully the rain that's been pouring for the past 3 days is making everything wet.
Dating the past week really put a stop to things. I was seeing an executive of a local Hawaii company. I had put an end to the dating since he only expressed interest in US based business, and doesn't want to get married, had a brutal drinking habit along with a couple of seedy and greedy girlfriends (and lived with one). So, go YIK. Now add in the fact that he was Japanese-American descent and not a "newbie" minority in the USA by SBA standards of 1 generation.
Then top it off with his habit to go to both Karaoke bars and Korean hostess bars in Hawaii where he bragged in his car rides of him & his friends splurging 10's of thosands of $$$$$$'s on the women. And, all followed up with a statement "if you need to prostitute and get busted, I'll bail you out." That was aside from going to a dinner at an acceptable chinese restaraunt with one of his business collegues and his "wife" who was from Osaka. The first words out of his collegues mouth were about someone potentially dying at some jobsite. And, it was followed up by his wife sending old-fashioned death threats to me with her chopsticks. My date then scolded me after the whole thing was over and became abusive.
I told one of my girlfriends about this and she simply said;- people like that are not your friends.
I couldn't have agreed more. That was over 6 mos. ago. Then he reappeared one night 5 months later at my apartment door, not just any night, but the night of my deceased brother's birthday! I should have called for a restraining order the following week.
The past week, he contacted me again. We went out for dinner and a few drinks. No major drama and he claimed that he had "cut down" on drinking. I think he just needed to hire a driver and skip the phone call to me. Though, given all that was said and happened in the past and that he's also older than I am, I really really don't think he gets it yet. He not only choses to absolutely humiliate me, treat me lower than a 3rd class citizen, but thinks that i'm willing to put up with it?! WTF... so I turned down the offer to see him again and attend his birthday at his family's home, as politely as was possible for me. Dating this Japanese-American was the most humililating experience, beyond what white racists do (where i've been abducted and assaulted), to me who is a newbie Japanese-American in the USA. My more respectable Japanese relatives want me to leave Hawaii because of dating like this--- no wonder. And, chances of my finding any hapiness in the USA seems absolutely futile.